A Common Misconception About True Love

Ah, love. There’s nothing quite like having such raw emotion and compassion pumping through your veins that overflows and spills out of your heart and soul without your consent. It’s such a beautiful thing to cherish good friendships and relationships to the point where you wouldn’t want to cause a single bit of tension (which obviously makes sense!) But what would you do if someone you loved was headed down a path that you sense might not be in their best interest? That’s when things can really get tricky.

Not many of us enjoy negative confrontation with the people we’re close to which is completely understandable… especially if it’s towards someone you can’t emotionally afford to lose. Sometimes you may think in your head that it’s better to pick and choose your battles, but what if someday you end up losing the war because of all of the “little” battles you relinquished? They may have seemed little at first, but things can add up crazy fast (like the interest on student loans!) Never is it easy to say to a friend or lover, “Hey, you mean so much to me and I don’t want to lose you, but I’m afraid that what you’re doing or where you’re heading might not be so great for you.” Even writing that gave me a tiny sense of uneasiness and I’m not even talking to anyone!

True love should start to kick in around this point. It’s kind of like a fight or flight response, but the decision you’ll make has heavy outcomes either way. When you honestly care for someone, their life choices could very well have a big impact on you. So if you feel something isn’t right, there will be unmistakable indications that you can’t shut off. For instance, you may get that nudging feeling tugging at your heart just wishing to get out into a safe space that can be shared between you and that person. Of course, you want to be delicate and tactful; but remember that truth is one of the many facets of genuine love.

When I think of what it means to really be there for someone and love them, there’s a verse from the bible that really stops me in my tracks when I think about it. John 15:3 “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” …WHAT! That’s crazy. If you think about it, you don’t truly love someone to the depth that you were meant to until you are willing to sacrifice your own life for that person. I’d just like to throw out that I’m in no way trying to shove my beliefs or faith down anyone’s throat ever, I’m just sharing my heart hoping it can help anyone that sees it.

Bottom line, that’s what it’s all about. How genuine is your love for your friends and family? Are you willing to stand firm on your beliefs and values to the point where it could cause a temporary (or in some cases) permanent rift in your relationships? I know this generation is all about “You do you, boo!” and I personally can’t stand that mentality because it simply shows that you don’t care, and that’s not cute. Love is not about accepting everything and saying, “Well, if it makes you happy…” it’s about saying, “I care for you way too much to sit idly by and watch you go down a dark path without sharing my heart with you because I want the best for you.”

Xo, Rachel